雅思大作文考官范文分析-电脑游戏是否坏处多于好处——G类1对1公号,“电脑游戏的利弊”是雅思大作文常考话题,本期,组长搬运前考官Simon范文过来并附分析,供大家学习积累话题相关词汇,以及“outweigh”题型的结构和常用表达。原文可点击页面左下方查看。
Some people regard video games as harmless fun, or even as a useful educational tool. Others, however, believe that video games are having an adverse effect onthe people who play them. In your opinion, do the drawbacks of video games outweigh the benefits?
Many people, and children in particular, enjoy playing computer games. While I accept that these games can sometimes have a positive effect on the user, I believe that they are more likely to have a harmful impact.
组长分析:这一段的学习点有3个,一是改写方式,采用“背景+观点综合”的方式,既对应了题中的内容,又给出了个人观点并从而回应写作任务,避免了用词重复;二是同义替换,an adverse effect = a harmful impact, benefits = positive effect;三是观点句的句式While..., I....这种句子结构让观点句意思清晰,同时预告了全文的结构,便于组织主体段。
On the one hand, video games can be both entertaining and educational. Users, or gamers, are transported into virtual worlds which are often moreexciting and engaging than real-life pastimes. From an educational perspective, these games encourage imagination and creativity, as well as concentration, logical thinking and problem solving, all of which are useful skills outside the gaming context. Furthermore, it has been shown that computer simulation games can improve users’ motor skills and help to prepare them for real-world tasks, such as flying a plane.
组长分析:主体段1呼应开头段观点句的前半部分“有积极作用”以及题目中的“fun”“educational tool”,中心句意思清晰、概括了全段。第二句解释为什么人们觉得电脑有意思有趣。第三句解释教育意义。第四句进一步解释教育意义。划线词汇为话题相关词,大家应注意积累users、gamers这类与话题相关的名词去替换people,encourage imagination...这一组词汇可以广泛用于教育类话题,应刻意记忆。
However, I would argue that these benefits are outweighed by the drawbacks. Gaming can be highly addictive because users are constantly given scores, new targets and frequent rewards to keep them playing. Many children now spend hours each day trying to progress through the levels of a game or to get a higher score than their friends. This type of addiction can have effects ranging from lack of sleep to problems at school, when homework is sacrificed for a few more hours on the computer or console. The rise inobesity in recent years has also been linked in part to the sedentary lifestyle and lack of exercise that often accompany gaming addiction.
组长分析:主体段2呼应开头段观点句的后半部分“有消极作用”,中心句是很好的“模板”,However承上启下,I would argue表明个人观点(回应题目中的In your opinion)。第二句指出电脑游戏的坏处“成瘾”及其原因,第二句说明成瘾的表现,第三句继续拓展说明成瘾的后果,第四句补充说明成瘾的另一个后果“对健康的影响”。下划线为话题词汇,目标7+考生应有意积累这类词汇,update自己的词汇库。
In conclusion, it seems to me that the potential dangers of video games are more significant than the possible benefits.