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雅思写作万年5.5要怎么破?这些雅思写作坑你避免了吗?

2020-07-15 11:33:43编辑:景景

  有时候听到“烤鸭”战场归来,兴致勃勃地说:“写作发挥不错,最低考6分,绝对没问题!”可是成绩出来却是5.5分,为什么?解开这个“ headache problem”的钥匙之一就是标点符号的使用是否正确。举学生习作为例:

  标点符号要用准

  ×

  例1

  Firstly, the reason is over-consumption of fresh water. Owingto increasing population and utilising more water consuming items, such as washing machinesand flush toilets.(误)

  【解析】:

  第一句没有问题,但是后面的“ Owing to increasing population and utilising more water consuming items, such as washing machines and flush toilets本身只是介词短语语,只是比较长罢了。“Owing to...”介词短语在文章中是不能单独存在的,因为它只是短语而不是句子,只能依附于一个句子而存在。

  而这里在“ Owing to...”介词短语的前后都用了句号,使得它孤立出来,造成错句。

  改正方法很简单:去掉第一句末尾的句号,然后“ Owing”首字母变回小写即可。

  改正如下:

  Firstly, the reason is over-consumption of fresh water owing to increasing population and utilising more water consuming items. such as washing machines and flush toilets

  【译】:

  第一个原因是由于人口的增长和使用更多的耗水用品,如洗衣机和冲水马桶,而导致的淡水的过量消耗。

  Ken’s tips:

  这样的错句

  单独拿出来看问题不大,但是放在一整篇作文当中往往会导致致命的错误。拿剑7 169页上的考官对一篇考生作文的评语来说就是

  The answer includes attempts at complex sentence forms, but these are generally awkwardly phrased and tend to require some re-reading to understand.”

  (作文尝试了使用主从复合句,但是总体上措辞表达很生硬笨拙,而且往往要读好几遍才能看懂意思。)

  想想,让考官评作文时眉头紧皱,抓耳挠腮,接着气血不通,怒发冲冠,最后咬牙切齿,目眦尽裂,作文分数怎么能高呢?解决问题的办法就是正确使用标点符号。

  ×

  例2

  Compulsory schooling is necessary nowadays, no matter in developed countries or developing countries. Because compulsory education is imperative toachieve equality in educational opportunities among the whole population. Aneffort should be made to ensure all children the age of 5 and 15 years attend some form of schooling.(误)

  【解析】:

  " because"引导的是原因状语从句,而后面一向才是主句。本应在原因状语从句和主句之间用逗号隔开,而本错句用了向号,使得原因状语从向孤立出来没有着落。雅思考官判定为缺乏主句,从而丢分。

  改正如下:

  Compulsory schooling is necessary nowadays, no matter in developed countries or developing countries. Because compulsory education is imperative to achieve equality in educational opportunities among the whole population, an effort should be made to ensure all children between the age of 5 and 15 years attend some form of schooling.

  【译】:

  现如今,无论是在发达国家还是在发展中国家,义务教育都是必要的。因为义务教育对于达到所有人接受教育机会平等来说是很重要的,所以应该努力保证所有5岁到15岁的孩子都能接受学校教育。

  (例二在第二章第一节中已经讲过一次,这里再重复一次,你记住了吗?)

  ×

  例3

  Lack of communication with their peers and short age of sports may result inchildrens poor health and flawed characteristics, Besides, the unfiltered information on the Internet could also pollute childrens thoughts.(误)

  【解析】:

  第二行逗号的后面是大写首字母的

  “ Besides,”这个逗号“,”错误!应将逗号改为句号,像这种错误不大影响文章的理解,一般不会扣分,但大家最好能注意这个细节,将雅思考官扣你分数的“罪恶”念头早早就扼杀在摇篮里!

  改正如下:

  Lack of communication with their peers and shortage of sports may result inchildrens poor health and flawed characteristics. Besides, the unfiltered informationon the Internet could also pollute childrens virgin minds.

  【译】:

  缺乏与同龄入的沟通以及体育锻炼会导致儿童身体健康状况不良以及性格缺陷。此外,互联网不经过滤的信息也可能会污染儿童天真的思想。

  总结。如果作文中出现一次这样的错误,上6分应该问题不大,但若是出现三五个的话,绝对6分以下!

  其实写作进步的过程就是改错的过程,只要能保证不犯同样的错误,练习一篇进步一篇,这样,错误就会越来越少,分数自然就会越练越高了。

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