雅思写作语法备考,句子主要成分先写好:主题句(topic sentence)要写好(更多雅思语法课程咨询可在线联系客服老师咨询近期开班详情)
例1 What's more, the outer space research should be maintained for its adventures, By adventures I mean that the astronauts are risking their lives. lt is true that some astronauts like those in challenger are devoted to the space programme. So, whether space research is valuable for welfare of human beings isalso a controversial problem.
【解析】:
第一句是主题句,表明观点:太空研究应当继续下去。
而这里的" for its adventures"就只能理解为:为了探险(这里用词不当)。接下来支持句说:宇航员在冒生命的危脸,进而提到挑战者号的宇航员们为大空事业献出生命。最后,得出结论太空研究对于人类的幸福是否具有价值这一问题仍然具有争议性。
从逻辑上说:主题句是正面观点,即支持太空研究。而接下来的两个支持句是反面观点,其一,危险;其二,更危险,有牺牲。最后的总结不正不反观点,说太空探索具有争议性。
那么,短短一个段落里,支持句不但没有支持主题句,反而反对主题句这不是“策反”吗?和主题句反看来,对看干,最后得出一个不正不反的结论,那就等于是走了一大圈最后又回到原来的出发点何!
①首先改掉语法错误:标点符号和大小写
②其次改逻辑问题,下面修改了主题句,当然也可以修改支持句;
③最后的结论也要出水芙蓉,浑然天成,反正就是要符合逻辑!
改正后的段落:
What's more, the outor space research should be restricted to a certain extent,for we have paid too heavy costs in the past 40 years. Astronauts are risking life and limb in probing into the unknown frontier. On January 28, 1986, with an unquenchable desire to explore the mysterious and beautiful universe, seven star voyagers of the space shuttle Challenger embarked onto the miraculous universe yet lost their lives in the ensuing explosion only 70 seconds after the launching.
Those unparalleled scientists devoted themselves to the space shuttle program,which is an all-time loss to our universe program.Hence, in order to prevent such atragedy from recurring, more scientific work on space programme should be done before we finger the infinite universe again.
【译】:
另外,应当在一定程度上限制太空研究,因为在过去的40年里我们为此付出的代价太大。在探索未知领域的过程中而就身的宇航员前仆后继。1986年1月28日,带着无法抑制的渴望去探索神秘而美丽的宇宙,7位挑战者号宇宙飞船的宇航员驶向奇妙的宇宙,然而飞船仅仅起飞70秒后就发生爆炸,宇航员丧生。这些凤毛麟角的科学家把他们的生命献给了太空探索,这也是人类太空计划有史以来最惨重的损失。因此,为了防止类似的悲剧重演,在我们又一次把手伸向无限的字宙之前,我们要做的太空计划的科学工作还有很多。